Money relationship? Don’t you mean mindset?

Money mindset is getting to be a big thing these days (google it and see!) but honestly, I hate it. There’s a hardness to mindset, which I think comes down to how it’s defined… “ a mental attitude or inclination.” It implies a level of dominance over money and over our brains, as though things would all just work out beautifully if we could get over our heads and grind it out. And there’s a hint of ‘not good enough.’ After all, if our mindset was right, then we would be golden right now.

Mindset also really pits our conscious brain against the world. But we know there is more to the world than our unconscious brain. We have our unconscious, formed by beliefs we were taught or ideas learnt through life experiences. And while we can’t control others, we know that our approach to other people, animals, places and things shapes how they respond to us.

So a question for you… are you done with hard? Are you done with ‘not enough’? What if we could be kinder, gentler to ourselves?

Let’s try on the term ‘relationship’. I don’t know about you, but it feels right to me. We’re not putting any value statements on ourselves. We’re not putting any value statements on money. We’re not putting value statements on the way that we are acting. We’re just looking at the relationship between ourselves and money, from a point of curiosity. We are wondering how this relationship is working for us right now.

Is your relationship filled with love?

Is your relationship filled with peace?

Is there fear?

Is there hate?

Is there anxiety? Resentment?

If your relationship with money isn’t working for you right now, you have a couple of choices. You could ignore it. But the fact is we live in a capitalist society, and you’ll have to deal with money at some point. And not to fear-monger (scare tactics suck), but challenges around money have a tendency to get worse if ignored.

The alternative is to give your relationship some love. You’ll do some self-reflection, and do some thinking about what stories you’re bringing into this relationship you have with money. You’ll have stories that still serve you, but you’ll also have stories whose useful life has expired. Acknowledge those stories, give them a compassionate thank you, and send them off with love.

Which choice will you be making?

(Psst… if you choose to give your relationship some love and want some practical help… we should talk!)